Narrator: A Japanese Sohei, the 16th century warrior monk who combined both asceticism and military prowess in search of spiritual enlightenment (Cut to a scene of a Sohei stabbing a Samurai with a Tachi)
A Knight of Saint John, the Crusader knights who not only fought the Saracens and Ottomans, but were also proficient doctors as well (Show a clip of a Knight of Saint John immolating a Janissary with a Trump)
WHO....IS...DEADLIEST?
(Deadliest Warrior intro theme)
Max: Today's match up pits two of the most famous warrior monks of all time: the Japanese Sohei and the Knights of Saint John. Not only is this a battle of East vs West, but since both of these warriors were active and at their most powerful during the 16th century, when gunpowder was being used in all kinds of weapons. We have blades, armor, and gunpowder, so this battle's gonna kick major ass!
Sohei Stats: Height: 5 foot 3 inches
Weight: 156 lbs
Armor: Monk Robes, Cuirass, Tassets, Cap
Reign: 794-1603 AD
Loyalty: Various Daimyo, Monasteries
Knight of Saint John Stats: Height: 5 foot 6 inches
Weight: 177 lbs
Armor: Morion, Cuirass, Tassets, Leather
Reign: 1099-1798 AD
Loyalty: The Grand Master, Papal States
Sohei Weapons: Long Range: Yumi: The Japanese Yumi was a longbow with an asymmetrical grip that was made from bamboo, horn, and wood.
Mid Range: Naginata: The Naginata was a Japanese weapon that resembled and had the same function as a European Glaive.
Short Range: Tachi: The Tachi was a forerunner to the Katana, and was more curved than its more famous predecessor.
Special Weapons: Arquebus: The Arquebus was a type of early firearm that made its way to Japan via Portuguese and Dutch merchants.
Knight of Saint John Weapons: Long Range: Matchlock: The Matchlock was another type of early firearm used in Europe during the 16th century.
Mid Range: Trump: The Trump was a unique weapon that was pretty much a giant torch filled with pitch, turpentine, gunpowder, and oil to act as a primitive napalm dispenser.
Short Range: Rapier: The Rapier was a a kind of sword that was thin, light, and well suited for thrusting.
Special Weapons: Grenade: The Grenade of the 16th century was an iron ball filled with gunpowder that was lit, thrown, and the explosion would send out the iron shell as shrapnel.
Narrator: Testing out the weapons of the famed Sohei are Kojii Masamune, an expert on Sohei warfare, and Phillip Green, a renowned historian of Feudal Japan.
Kojii: The Sohei were a sect of warrior monks, who, like the Ikko-Ikki, used both meditation and battle to reach enlightenment.
Narrator: During the time period known as Feudal Japan, the Japanese countryside was littered with dozens of monasteries that taught their disciples how to defend themselves from the wandering bandits that attacked what they perceived to be weak and defenseless places. Through their training, they not only fought off all bandits, but they became so powerful that certain warlords like Oda Nobunaga actually hired them to fight alongside them in their battles to unify Japan.
Phillip: Against such a cunning and disciplined foe, the Knight of Saint John will crumble
Narrator: The Sohei Team is assured of their victory, but they have vicious competition from their opponents on Team Knight of Saint John. Fighting for the Knights is Antonio Colombo, a period sword and gun expert, as well as Roger James, a Maltese-born historian specializing on the Knights of Saint John.
Roger: The Knights of Saint John were an order of warrior monks who, unlike the other Crusader orders, continued to fight the Muslims in the Mediterranean Basin after the fall of Jerusalem and Acre.
Narrator: After the Fall of Acre in 1291, the Knights of Saint John moved to Rhodes, where they continued to fight the Muslims and heal the sick until the Ottomans conquered the island and they were forced to go to Malta. The greatest challenge to the Knights came in 1565, when the Ottomans decided to invade Malta, which had a garrison of no more than 700 Knights. Although the Order was almost extinguished, they managed to beat back the Ottomans and ensure the survival of their knighthood.
Antonio: The Knights of Saint John will destroy the Sohei, just like they destroyed everyone else they fought.
Weapons Tests:
Long Range Weapons:
Sohei: Yumi
Knight of Saint John: Matchlock
The accuracy of the Yumi and quicker rate of fire gives it the Edge over the Matchlock.
Mid Range Weapons:
Sohei: Naginata
Knight of Saint John: Trump
The failure of the Naginata to pierce the Knight of Saint John's armor, as well as the devastating damage done to the dummy by the Trump gives the Knight of Saint John the Edge.
Short Range Weapons:
Sohei: Tachi
Knight of Saint John: Rapier
The result is Even, because both weapons did the same amount of damage and the hosts were unable to reach a decision.
Special Weapons:
Sohei: Arquebus
Knight of Saint John: Grenade
The Edge goes to the Grenade because the shrapnel tore through the Sohei's armor easily, while the Arquebus' bullet bounced off of the Knight of Saint John's cuirass.
Geoff: Hey Max, you ready to see how this battle will turn out?
Max: You bet I am. Time to see which of these warrior monks is deadliest: Sohei or Knight of Saint John
Narrator: Because these warrior monks fought as a unified army, this will be a squad on squad battle between three Sohei monks and three Knights of Saint John.
Simulation:
The wind blew gently as the morning sunshine gleamed off of the cuirasses of three Knights of Saint John who were wielding various weapons and trudging through the snow covered meadow. Suddenly they stopped walking, their breath catching in the air when they saw the three Sohei walk up to their position and stare at them. None of the six warrior monks moved a muscle until one of the Sohei knocked an arrow onto his Yumi, pulled back the bowstring, and fired. The arrow deflected off of the Knight's cuirass as the Knight aimed his Matchlock and pulled the trigger as a cloud of smoke enveloped the combatants.
When the smoke cleared, one of the Sohei lay dead in the snow, his bleeding throat turning the snow a sickly shade of red. Upon seeing their dead comrade, the other two Sohei fled into the woods, all the while being hotly pursued by the Knights of Saint John. As one of the Knights chased a Sohei up a wooded hill, the Sohei aimed his Arquebus and shot the Knight in the chest, knocking the Knight to the ground. Before the Knight could get up, however, the Sohei unsheathed his Tachi and decapitated his adversary.
Running from where he killed the Knight, the Sohei was surprised to find that yet another Knight stood ready to kill him. Wielding a Naginata, the Sohei stabbed at the Knight's chest, but the blade of his weapon bounced off the Knight's Cuirass. Undeterred, the Knight unsheathed his Rapier and thrust it deep into the Sohei's side. The dead monk collapsed into the snow as the Knight turned around and fell into the snow as well, an arrow buried into his forehead.
Meanwhile, the final Knight of Saint John had spied the final Sohei, and he lobbed a Grenade at him. The loud explosion and the blinding flash of light knocked the Sohei flat on his back, and when he got up he saw that pieces of shrapnel had sliced him up and some pieces even buried into his flesh. Wincing with pain, the Sohei pulled out the shrapnel and turned to face the final Knight, who had prepared his Trump and was moving closer to the Sohei. Without another thought, the Sohei gripped his Tachi tightly in his fist and lunged at the Knight, but to no avail.
The Trump's napalm quickly began to incinerate the Sohei's robes, and the more the monk flailed around, the hotter and hotter the flames became. Eventually, the Sohei's charred corpse fell into the snow as the Knight of Saint John withdrew his Rapier and pointed it skyward, looking upwards as he did so.
Winner: Knight of Saint John
Max: When i ran this simulation, i saw that the Knights of Saint John won the match with 656 kills, while the Sohei only got 344 kills. The Knights of Saint John's advantage lay not only in the Trump, but in the Grenade and Rapier. That said, the Yumi did achieve far more kills than the Matchlock did. I personally think that this was a good all around match.
Geoff: I agree with you Max. I will admit that i thought that the Sohei's discipline and skill would help them win, but after seeing the Trump in action, i can totally understand why the Knight's of Saint John won the match.
Phillip: This is malarky. The Sohei were far more sophisticated and cunning warriors than the Knights of Saint John and would have run circles around those clumsy oafs!
Antonio: Well what were you expecting? The Knights of Saint John proved that even though they had less discipline, they could still whup your sorry asses!
(Show a scene of the Knights of Saint John standing triumphantly over Fort St. Elmo)
